July 16, 2011:
After lunch I went to a cafe to do some planning for work. After a while, an attractive girl about my age came and sat close by. She had tight pants on and a low-cut blouse and she talked with a sexy European accent.
Her presence really threw me into turmoil. I found myself wanting to talk to her and dreaming of ways to start a conversation. To make matters worse, it seemed like she was ‘open’ to me as well.
I’m writing this because I realized how easy it would be to have an affair if I didn’t believe it was wrong and didn’t love my wife so much that I wouldn’t want to hurt her. But still, I longed for that experience of being mutually attracted for the first time: the excitement, the possibilities, the buoyant happiness. And I asked God if as married people we have given up that chance forever? I pray to experience that again within the confines of God’s holiness.